Thursday, November 29, 2007

a neglected room


My studio. A room of my own. This is how it looks right now. I haven’t been active in it for some time. Things have piled up, stuff that doesn’t belong in there has been thrown in for lack of a better place. My work lies half started, half finished in piles on the tables and stacked against walls. It is a mess, and it is not being used. We live in a small three-bedroom cookie-cutter track house; our bedroom, Offspring's bedroom, and my studio. Offspring's toys spread all over the family room. The desktop computer (and accompanying paraphernalia) is wedged into the dining room/living room area between the table and a bookshelf. And there is just so much STUFF, how did we get so much stuff? Other families in this suburb have an extra room specifically for the “play room” or the “study/computer room.” In these homes everything seems to fit so nice. Us, we have a failed artist clinging to a fading dream by holding a whole room hostage to her hopes. And I haven’t been in it for months except to toss more stuff on the piles of junk. Recently I have been thinking of clearing it all out, tossing a lot of it, burning even more, keeping only what can fit into a medium sized box stashed somewhere on a shelf in the garage and turning the room into the “play room” or “study” or some other functional family space… but I haven’t brought myself to do it. Not yet. Partly because that would require a lot of work, and right now it is easier to leave everything the way it is. And also, I keep thinking ‘I AM going to get back in there!'
Any day now.

4 comments:

mfranti said...

I'm surprised you haven't painted the walls! Niel and I painted his studio a neutral gray so for his photography. I will say, your room looks better than n's studio. flat files piled high. paper paper paper everywhere.unhung art work on the floors.

if it was up to me, I'd clean his room and make it pretty but that space is sacred. i dare not go in there except in emergency.

people like you need a space away from the rest of your life.
don't convert it! use the time you spend of the puter to "color between the lines" as niel puts it.

love Mfranti

Unknown said...

"color between the lines"

very good idea.
in fact I have a few hours today where max is at school... I think I'll go in and start working again on one of those "half started/half finished pieces"

(I was planing on cleaning the bathroom... I like this idea better!)

mfranti said...

"I read, write, and make stuff"

i find this funny...

n's parents have no clue what he does so once when he said he "makes stuff"
(or something like that) his moms said "like with construction paper?"

i think niel just went along with it because it much easier to let them think what they want to think.

Unknown said...

"like with construction paper?"

yep. with construcion paper.

and wax.

and cloth.

and crayons.


ps. i just got done cleaning off both the tables in my studio... maybe I'll go 'make stuff' now.