Thursday, June 17, 2010

sensitivity, insecurity, thick/thin skinned...

Today Sean wrote a bit about insecurity, being thin skinned, and avoiding rejection. (Random coincidence, so did Wendy.)
He basically just took the words out of my mouth.

As an interesting joiner to that revelation; I'm meeting with an old friend tonight; he is convinced that if we do a brainstorming session on the subject, I will come away from it knowing how I can make at least as much off of my art, as I could off some run-of-the-mill day job (a prospect I am considering as money gets increasingly tight for us.)

I agreed to this brainstorming session with outward enthusiasm, but feel I should confess a good deal of... nervousness? Just how to I explain to this enthusiastic friend all of my insecurities, my fears, my lack of experience and knowledge and my low self-esteem, my inadequacy... Already pinging around in the back of my head are all the usual excuses I feed myself about lack of time, means, business savvy... Plus the usual line that I may be better off doing this 'thing' I do on the sidelines as a 'hobby' (hate hate hate that word)...

I've written about my insecurities on this topic before.

Nevertheless, I am curious about what we will come up with during this brainstorming session.


Sean said...

One of my fears about trying to "monetize" my writing (either by submitting stories to magazines or becoming a freelance writer of some kind) is that it'll suck all the fun and spontaneity out of it. That it'll start to feel like a job.

On the other hand, I do some of my best writing under deadline (this is the reason I passed most of my non-math classes, despite goofing off and putting off the homework) so maybe deadlines and structure and expectations are what I need.

But then again, being self-employed (even if it's on the side) sounds TERRIFYING.


Sean said...

Oh, I forgot.


G said...

Sean~ thanks :) (and DITTO, re: self-employment being terrifying and worrying about losing the joy of it)